women’s health

Women have a really intricate hormonal and bodily balance that can tip off and cause problems. Easily. It doesn’t require a “perfect storm”.
Common symptoms that let you know there is a problem are:
* bleeding changes with your periods
* sudden weight gain or loss, bloating, fatty
* cravings, appetite changes
* abdominal pain, cramps
* discharges
* migraines (I know, wrong end, but it’s true!)
* pain during or after sexual activity
* gas, bowel changes
I don’t mean once or twice. I don’t mean your friend has something with symptoms like you had once in college or HS.
And to differentiate often takes actual pathological tests. Not what your friend thinks might be wrong.

Some of the things can be minimized by taking care of yourself; fitness, healthy diet, not smoking, using a condom when you have sex…
Some of the things? Well shit, you just got a bad genetic code somewhere, and sucks for you.

A lot of these things can be managed, without having major surgery. Some can’t be managed even with it. Because by the time you realize you’re having an issue (symptoms) you are too far along and treatment is a “hail mary”. At least by Western medicine.

A lot of the current research says [PAP tests][https://forwomenseyesonly.com/2012/11/13/what-doctors-dont-want-you-to-know-about-pap-tests-and-pelvic-exams/] , mamograms and ultrasounds are the way to go to keep on top of your health. But unless you can get an appt in the window of your cycle, and have a doctor and lab & radio tech who are on top of their game, you will get a false result in up to 60% of the cases.

Your best advocate for your health though, is still you. So be sure you keep track of things like cycles, bowel movements, eat a healthy diet full of fibre, folic acid, balance your Omega 3 & 6 fats, D3 and iron and reduce caffeine (yes I mean chocolate too) and alcohol. Also as you age, it’s really important to watch your calcium and magnesium intake. You DON’T want brittle bones!
Good luck ladies!
Oh if you don’t believe me, here are the readings (yawn)…

. . . .
[pcos – endocrine disorder][http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/polycystic-ovarian-syndrome/Pages/symptoms.aspx]
[fallopian tube][http://pubs.rsna.org/doi/full/10.1148/rg.312105090]
[endometrial polyps][http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/uterine-polyps/basics/symptoms/con-20027472]
. . . .
[polyps, cysts, or fibroids][http://www.arobgyn.com/cysts-fibroids-polyps-whats-difference-cancer/]
[endometrial hyperplasia][http://www.cancer.ca/en/cancer-information/cancer-type/uterine/uterine-cancer/precancerous-conditions/?region=bc]
[smoking and the birth control pill][http://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements/estrogen-and-progestin-oral-contraceptives-oral-route/side-effects/drg-20069422]
[hypothyroidism – endocrine][https://www.edmcasereports.com/articles/endocrinology-diabetes-and-metabolism-case-reports/10.1530/EDM-13-0050]

. . . .

Women in the Work Force Today (yes I said today!)

What is the point of a woman being in the work force if she can’t get equal pay for equal value? And how can the world of over 7 B people cope if women never hold down a job?  Especially if the people spend at least half their year working for the govt and are encouraged to spend spend spend in the modern consumerist society? AND when women often get left alone to raise the next gen.

[wage parity][http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/gender-pay-gap-a-persistent-issue-in-canada/article34210790/] 74-75c p/dollar

[disparity effects GDP][http://www.theglobeandmail.com/report-on-business/careers/canada-slow-to-close-gender-pay-gap-despite-projected-gdp-boost/article26761080/]

[Princeton  –  effects of poverty on children][https://www.princeton.edu/futureofchildren/publications/docs/07_02_03.pdf]

If she is poor and underserved by the education system, she is forced to work in limited, go-no-where occupations and raise her kids by those limited proceeds.

[poor mom can lead to generations of poverty and need for social services/supports][http://nationalassembly.org/Uploads2/Resources/NHSAFull_Report2GenOSOWFamilies.pdf]

And she is penalized for procreating by lesser wages and mistreatment by the govt and her employers and coworkers. Just because she is a woman.

There are things employers could do… the govt could legislate… to make it easier on working moms. That would help a LOT. Well for some occupations anyway.
[flex time][https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/workhours/flexibleschedules]
[remote working][http://www.theglobeandmail.com/report-on-business/careers/career-advice/experts/work-from-home-the-same-rules-apply/article8846672/]
[Supreme Court – employers must accommodate child care][http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/employers-told-they-must-accommodate-staff-s-child-care-requests-1.1315953]

for women who work at least, if they won’t do anything else. I mean isn’t that the LEAST they could do??
And after all those years of work, how do we end up?  Poor!  So what exactly is the point?

[women retiring and pension disparity due to caregiving][http://canadianlabour.ca/issues-research/did-you-know-senior-women-are-twice-likely-live-poverty-men]

I’ve been hearing that we have it all together and feminism is no longer relevant today… I think you might have missed out on some schooling.
But hey it USED to be worse. We’re no longer chattel! (looks at links)  Or are we??

your libido

Your libido is influenced by many factors. But they come in certain groups that influence you.

Beginning with the love maps you developed as a child watching your parents interact, (Dr John Money), you watch the world and the people near and dear to you and consider in your sub-conscious what that means for you. How intimate you can be and how much you will trust others.
* You bond from conception to @ 3 yrs of age
* Your primary social learning is done prior to 7 yrs of age.
It is also influenced by how safe you felt as a child and young adult. This affects how “present” you can be in a sexual context.
Then there is your physical health – Hormones, allergies, neurotransmittors (serotonin, dopamine, endorphins…)
What your perception is of who you are and who your partner is/could be: gender, orientation, attraction potentials.
And your mental status – anxiety, depression, OCD, awareness of self and other (bonding, personality)
And finally, if you have been victimized as a sexual being and develop PTSD.
It cannot possibly be derived from one simple source as humans are complex creatures.
Bottom line, sexuality and gender come from you, your partner and those who influenced you both. And they have multi-social institutional impacts.
Here are a few places you can begin your education on what makes you be easily or minimally interested in sexual expression and relationships. And some questions for you to consider…
# . . . . . .
# sources

## Destination
* Do you expect that all romantic relationships involve commitment?

* How long do you think relationships should last?

* Can you not be satisfied until you find the right romantic partner?

## Time to destination

* What is the ideal length of time between meeting someone and arriving at a romantic commitment (saying “I love you”)?

* If you’re in between relationships, how long do you think is healthy until you get into your next relationship?

* How long are you willing to wait until your partner is able to make a commitment to you?

## Obstacles to avoid

* How much disagreement would you be willing to accept between you and your partner on basic life values?

* Does the prospect of getting into an argument with your partner excite or frighten you?

* If a partner doesn’t want a monogamous relationship, is that a deal-breaker for you?

* How important is it to you that you and your partner spend most of your time separate from other friends, family, or social obligations?

* From these questions, we can identify 4 types of lovemaps:
## Relationship-oriented:
You desire commitment, want your relationships to last, and don’t like being without a partner, and want your relationships to be conflict-free. You prefer to be with your partner but don’t mind spending time with others.


1 . Denial and dissociation
2. Avoidance behaviors (due to shame, despair and fear)
3. Delusional omnipotence (controlling that which will achieve the sexual aim of the addict)
4. Narcissism and deception
5. Sexual obsessive and compulsive behaviors (out of control)
6. Risk taking
7. Excessive fantasy
8. Endangering one’s professional and family life
9. Tolerating abusive relationships
10. Living a double life
11 . Desperate and irresponsible behaviors
12. Lack of appropriate boundaries
13. Decrease in one’s spiritual or religious life








therapeutic avatars series pt 1

high tech sex therapy

She was one of the galaxy’s best marital counselors and was known for how well she worked with sexual dysfunctions. Before she took them in as clients, she had the clients undergo medical tests, so she knew they were healthy and up to the rigors of sexual behaviour. Her avatars helped her to guide her clients thru the intricacies of good sex. Without having any issues with jealousy or hygiene. What can you catch from an avatar after all?
The men she was most helpful with were those with performance anxiety. She coached them thru their difficulties by having naughty nurse do strip teases and erotic shows. Get them stimulated to the point where they had to act.
With the women, she was most helpful with those who had past traumas. Frisky firefighter  would patiently and with no expectations or needs outside of the woman’s get closer to them by degree.
And for the couples, the avatars would put on sex demos to show how something was done. For couples who were bored or too innocent to get the basics down.
She had a really high success rate. People came from all over the universe just to see her. And she made time for them. She’d rather have more avatars than let a person in need get left behind.


[Naughty nurse] wanted to show me her strip tease before she did it for a client.  I have to admit, I was titillated. She was gorgeous after all.

When she entered the room, all you could see was her white cape and [red boa]. On such innocence, the red was shocking. Almost jarring.

Then the opening notes of Peggy Lee https://youtu.be/b4hXyALR9vI

came over the speakers.  I understood the red now.  She walked around the dias and made a few sways and dips as she lip synced to the lyrics. It was really cute and feminine. Ok I was curious what  would come next.

The opening cords played of the next song,

George Michael  https://youtu.be/vldh7oQD-a4) and her white cape hit the floor in a flash.  She stood before me still covered in  white till she turned around.  I saw peeks of red. She started to use the pole in this song and it became a bit sexier. Ok now we were getting somewhere!

As the next song began, Christina Aguilera, Lil Kim, Mya & Pink  https://youtu.be/RQa7SvVCdZk she dropped the long white apron. There was little innocence left. So the bump and grind began. It was a completely different dance by the time we heard the next song. Barry White  https://youtu.be/Bf9vJ0zpdUg  She flashed her boobs and shook her booty. I mean what woman wouldn’t react to Barry in a sex way?  But when the next song came on, Def Leppard  https://youtu.be/0UIB9Y4OFPs it went beyond a tease, to an invitation. I was squirming on my seat… My eyes were wide open and I was primed. The only thing that saved her from me springing on the stage was my curiousity. I wanted to see what was in store. Even when she took the bra of the bikini off!

When Marvin Gaye https://youtu.be/x6QZn9xiuOE  came on,  I was glad I hadn’t pounced. First the tease, then the invitation, now she was having sex with the pole. I was panting. I thought I was impressed then and for what i knew, I was. It was going to be a hit!

As Dr Hook  https://youtu.be/5A-P9HToc_g  began her bikini panties started to shimmy down her hips, then her legs and I was enthralled. I wasn’t sure how she managed it. She hardly used her hands.  When they hit the floor, she reached into a box I hadn’t noticed for SOME reason, and pulled out a [boa constrictor !! I almost fainted!  I almost ran! But I couldn’t and as she began sliding the snake over her and coiling it around her body to Rod Stewart  https://youtu.be/IZr6AE-u2UM , I was soooooo glad I stayed.  It was not a common show and the clients would be thrilled by it. Now that would turn on a dead man!  And some women too!

I stood up on my wobbly legs, ever so careful to stay away from the snake, and did the jazz hands. Aint no way I was scaring the snake with loud noises!!


[Frisky firefighter] had a much slower groove with the clients as he dealt with trauma victims. So something as overtly sexual as [naughty nurse] enjoyed doing so much wouldn’t fly at all. He was all hearts and flowers, affection vs sexuality, and erotic dancing vs sexual tease and torture. He was a courtly gentleman, whether his clothes were on or off.  He asked, he didn’t badger. And what was on offer was whatever the woman accepted.
He came in with [rose water]and a very courtly attitude toward the client. He kept his distance until he was given permission to get closer. And he came in stages, just asking for a small contact.
First he asked,  [I wanna hold your hand][https://youtu.be/46_yYR6tGOI] and waited till he had a yes before he continued. Even if he had to sit on auto replay for months, it went no faster than she was ready. But finally the day came, and he was their [hand to hold on to][https://youtu.be/0LyUCy3eOvs] .  And he took the time to celebrate each small success, before they tried for the next one.  Because you never knew…
When they were ready for the next stage, he asked [can I have a kiss?][https://youtu.be/r6jM3vjfRy8] and waited for her yes. Ever patient, ever loving, ever tender. This stage might be easier. But then again, it might be harder as well.  Having given ground, the client might become inflexible about giving more. Very much about self protection. Or they might see that ask as a trigger of what had occurred in their traumatic event and be unable to go there. Not without extensive counseling. He might have to wait years, but one day he was ready for [this kiss][https://youtu.be/dls_cBmUt7Q] and so was the client.  Usually more of a peck than anything but quite an achievement when it occurred.
And the dance within the dance began.  [1 step forward, 2 steps back][https://youtu.be/Jfrt9v_56MU] . But he was ever patient and tender. Where most humans would have been frustrated, he didn’t know what that meant. That’s why he was such an awesome tool for the counselor.
The affection grew and so did their relationship. He could ask for bigger things than the affection tools. Like can you [trust me?][https://youtu.be/Mfq3RXE1NaY]
Without this key element, the affection tools were a waste of time. It took some negotiation, but terms were set and they would be honoured.
So they could move on.  And he asked for her to [hug my soul][https://youtu.be/PlOhwYwYBOE] and awaited her/his response. Again he might get a quick yes but then have to wait her/him out on the next gain. But when the client was ready, they were [smothered in hugs][https://youtu.be/Fn1U_n0J-I8] . It was a rest stage , where intimacy was gained as well as [a little respect][https://youtu.be/RiKVjS3gR88] .
Finally, the last affection tool was used.  To begin, he became their [tiny dancer][https://youtu.be/hoskDZRLOCs] and slowly drew them into the show with him. Where naughty nurse had been just a show, he and the client danced together when he asked [touch me when we’re dancing][https://youtu.be/wi4igeViQBo] and waited for them to be ready.  In this final affection tool, he saw them graduate to a survivor and honoured that with the client and the counselor. They had a little ceremony where he gave them a [rose bud] and reminded them that though [every rose has it’s thorn][https://youtu.be/hcOoymRN6kQ] , they now knew they could survive. They had come far and weren’t likely to slide backwards.
The clients were very proud and it looked good for them being able to translate their new skills into the human world.  But if they needed a refresher course, he was always there for them. Never frustrated if he had to help again. The advantage of using an avatar, instead of a man.

Avatar Anal Nookie

Naughty nurse and frisky firefighter were asked to put on a demo about anal sex.
The counselor reminded the clients that this wasn’t the porn version they might have been used to seeing. The bottom wasn’t just meant to be flipped over and banged into like their innards were anything but skin.
There had to be lead up stimulation. Arousal had to be increased before the rectum was penetrated. Lube was required. It was more hygenic to use a condom, whether it was your monogamous partner or not.
So frisky firefighter began kissing and rubbing naughty nurse ready. Thinking he was the one who would be penetrating. But the counselor cued for pegging instead. So naughty nurse took over the lead and stimulated him instead.
She kissed and nibbled his lips, ears and neck. She twisted and rubbed his nipples. Then she reached for his penis and massaged it. Until he was oozing pre-ejaculate.
Naughty nurse picked up a small dildo and used it to massage his rectal area. And slowly played it into his anus. In and out slowly. When she felt him relax, she reached for a larger size and worked it in and out slowly. Then she took a couple fingers, and massaged behind his testicles to stimulate his prostate.
She strapped on her fave dildo and when he was starting to ejaculate, she slowly penetrated his anus. And gently rocked in and out of him. It extended his orgasm quite a bit to be stimulated like that.
The clients were watching closely, so the counselor encouraged them to get up and go closer to the demo. The woman watched naughty nurse and the man squatted by frisky firefighter’s butt and watched how his body handled the penetration.
The clients were sure the act was over when he ejaculated. Instead they saw that he was rolling thru several in a row and naughty nurse was getting into it as well. His response was increasing. And he had an orgasm, rather than just the ejaculations just prior. The male client looked quite surprised and more than curious about how this would feel. Up till then, he had thought ejaculating once was what sex was for men. Maybe another one after a rest if the man was younger. But no, frisky firefighter was now having multiple orgasms. So he asked if that was possible for human men, The counselor said of course! Or they wouldn’t have shown it.
The demo was wound down and the counselor reminded them of the tips so they could go home and practice.

  • It’s not a porn, so slow and steady at least to begin.
  • Increase the penetration
  • Stimulate the prostate, from either behind the testicles or just inside the rectum
  • Use rocking motions
  • and him especially, just relax.

The counselor was asked about diet. She said if he was healthy, eating well (fiber is your friend!) and regular, there was really nothing special to consider. Just wait a bit after eating. There might be minor discharge. But that’s why she recommended the condom. That and a quick wash afterwards. And all was good.
The clients reported afterward that all had gone well. They were happy with their activities and glad they had been shown how.

therapeutic avatars series pt 2

[Naughty nurse] and [frisky firefighter] were eager to help when the counselor proposed a master class in oral sex. Almost to a human level. They were quite surprised by the statistics on human sexual deficiencies in orgasm and in performance anxiety. After some practice and tips from the counselor, they were ready to show the audience.
Surprisingly a lot of people err when they think they have to just gulp and [swallow it][https://youtu.be/pR2MxYNlTc4] .  Oral sex is so much more than that.  At least it should be!
The avatars showed the audience how to [lick it up][https://youtu.be/UBozyHxiPgk]  like a lollipop first.  Some tease is always good before the demand or pressure of deep throat or tongues used as a pile driver.  And some people prefer the tease and prolonging of their experience.  Not everyone wants to cum in less than a minute. And not all can either. Especially if you virtually demand it.
Along with the tease, some like a little pain or irritation in their experience, so nibbles or [love bites][https://youtu.be/C7gMtWTMNt8] add to their experience.
Some people like hard bites. As with all sexual matters, oral sex is very much an individually geared activity.
Of course,  it is important to  [suck][https://youtu.be/O7CXqFiEP-Y] , either the penis or the clitoris. But not all the time!! It becomes too sensitive that way. Changing the stimulation is the best way to prolong the experience, and make it more enjoyable as well.
With the men who have a ready trigger, oral sex can be a good way of teaching them better management of their bodies. Give them a little bit at a time, [just a taste][https://youtu.be/WEJPlk45BeE] so they can’t count on the rythmn.
Practice is fun and necessary to help someone who has challenges with their orgasms or anxiety. They want it over and over and say [do that to me one more time][https://youtu.be/6ORUZxO0tw0] .
It’s important to take a [slow hand][https://youtu.be/pnVOt2LK2Gg] when it comes to sex. And lastly, don’t forget to use your hands as well as your mouth when engaging in oral sex. You can also use toys. Sex doesn’t always have to be about penis and vagina meeting. Yawn!  Boring!!
Oral sex can be and often is, a very intimate experience. Especially when couples do it.  And when they understand what their partner needs, they more easily arrive at orgasms. [I feel love][https://youtu.be/f0h8Pjf4vNM]
If one partner is in chastity, it’s a good relief method for the other as well.
Just don’t forget to use condoms and dental dams for STD prevention! And have fun with it!
The counselor asked  [naughty nurse]and  [frisky firefighter] to put on a demo about bdsm. They came to a [meeting of the minds] . While they got ready, the counselor gave a talk to the clients about the [common ideals] found  in the lifestyle. And a safety talk on [bondage] , [flogging] , and the [human body] .  By then naughty nurse and frisky firefighter were ready to perform.
Their tracks were cued… and naughty nurse took the lead to [venus in furs][https://youtu.be/K26Ersrc8L0] . She flicked her furs and whips around and stunned the clients with her prowess.  The clients weren’t sure if frisky firefighter was excited or scared.  Maybe both… he was a little pale and sweaty. Naughty nurse was too for that matter. But as they got into the groove, they both perked up. Just in time for[the masochism tango][https://youtu.be/EHID8hMgWKc] to play.

After the song, some posturing and a  few whips, they took a break so naughty nurse could check frisky firefighter’s well being.

The counselor talked about the importance of [safe words],  finding a [peer][

and what [the power roles were] .

Then naughty nurse and frisky firefighter were ready to go again.  They cued the song

[hatefuck][https://youtu.be/AJk6sV4MsQo] and played it out to the audience’s delight. Some were clapping and some were squirming in their chairs at the thought. But the last song have them a bit worried… [Breath control][https://youtu.be/Uh7xhCwn3Ng] was something they hadn’t heard before and they weren’t sure how literally this would be taken. Then they remembered, frisky firefighter was just an avatar. They laughed a bit at their silliness and watched the show. It did make them squirm that what they were watching wasn’t exactly legal in their time…

**the counselor on being mean  – the nemesis of love

Animals are mean because they are protecting themselves, their territory, their young, or they are scared. If you leave them alone and they aren’t hungry, they’ll leave you alone too. Not so much with humans though.

[mean-spirited animals][http://listverse.com/2013/06/27/10-most-downright-ferocious-or-ill-tempered-animals/]
Humans don’t need to be missing a meal to go after you nor do they need to be protecting someone or something either. They get jealous and they get lonely so they lash out. Or they don’t understand you, so they attack. Get them together in a group and they can mob you to death, literally and metaphorically. They won’t let go either. Whether they are right or wrong. Even if they see their victim is seriously harmed by their meanness. Some don’t even feel remorse if the person they attack, ceaselessly, kills themselves.

Nothing is sacred or off- limits either. They shame the weak, they tease the hungry, and they bully the young and small. Maybe the animals should rule the world? {the bitch is back][https://youtu.be/upR7GQ5ToCs]
A lot of people have difficulty understanding the difference between types of positive social censure like constructive criticism, or teasing someone in a light, loving way vs tearing them apart. Or failure to support someone who is having a hard enough time  coping.  Aren’t we here to help each other after all? [put a little love in your heart][https://youtu.be/CMj7UcjPZ0U]

That type of behaviour  reminds me of [vultures]

They never go after a healthy human or animal. But they will pick on the sick and weak, the dying and start feeding. Before the last breath.

They presume that bluster is healthy ego and set out to destroy the poser. They presume that aggression is the cause, vs the symptom.  Aggression is the front for fear, deprivation or sadness.   Don’t forget that whining is a form of passive aggression. So that friend who can only say bad things about themself or others?  Yep aggression. Assertion is healthy.

They can worry at a loved one till that person no longer feels love.

It’s one thing to have a kink for shaming or humiliating, presuming that you build them up afterwards and they get it’s part of the script. It’s another to constantly undermine their autonomy and self image. That is abusive and can have the opposite effect of what you are looking for if the purpose is to change them in any healthy or coping direction. And it changes both the people involved.  The victim and yes the shamer too.

[bad blood][https://youtu.be/Xz8VJ9y6pa4]

As far as sex goes, (minus those who have a kink for shaming or humiliation) it can really reduce their desire to engage with you. Which really sabotages the relationship. [harder to breathe][https://youtu.be/rV8NHsmVMPE]
So watch that negging and you will have a far healthier and more  frequent sex life.  Something to work for, huh?

[facts about vultures][http://annamiticus.com/2012/08/27/16-things-you-might-not-know-about-vultures/]

**the counselor

The counselor was made just right for human counseling programs.  The scientists had spliced animal genes together wih human ones to make the perfect carer. They wanted someone who was wired to gain positive results from their clients. A counselor was needed that was protective, kind, sharing and would be very smart and observant. After all, people were coming to them in pain.
[love hurts][https://youtu.be/6pHNkOQCIzk]
The vampire bat seemed like an odd choice since it would take blood from humans.  But when a friend or family member needed help, they were there.
[I’ll share my world with you][https://youtu.be/SJv4Q8Dz_NA]
The ringed seal was potentiially violent due to it’s size, but when push came to shove, the seal would protect it’s own. So it was a matter of the counselor bonding with the clients and all would be well.
[handle with care][https://youtu.be/L8s9dmuAKvU]
The giant bull frog went to lengths to keep their young safe and was very tender with them.
[love me tender][https://youtu.be/-Y-bd3aDMGA]
The dolphin was kind and protective to those in need, whether or not they were their own.
[I’ll stand by you][https://youtu.be/SuWAGT9ZkYE]
The dog was willing and able to foster babies even outside it’s own species, even if it should by instinct be it’s prey. And it could be trained to assist humans.
[Give a little bit][https://youtu.be/HKhPePHcj2k]
The ant was quite the worker and very helpful and protective of it’s queen and the babies. They were bound to the social hierarchy.
[Rock me gently][https://youtu.be/7kPzSdOoxC4]
After a few relationships and some training, the counselor was ready to take on the first couple.
[I Want to know what love is][https://youtu.be/tUYGzZ0tQpA]
[caring animals][http://webecoist.momtastic.com/2009/08/28/natures-wild-nurses-5-caring-animal-species/]
The project had begun!