Slow Hand Luke

Slow Hand Luke

I could see how he was frustrating everyone… I had been watching him all day. And the people around him were getting annoyed. All his moves were measured, slow, calculated. That’s fine if you aren’t in a rush, but very few occupations aren’t these days.
His supervisor had hired him because he was his brother-in-law, and his wife had begged him. If it weren’t for the fact he was sure he’d be sleeping on the couch from now till Christmas, he’d have fired him. He just took a swig of Pepto and booked a dental appt for something to stop his teeth from grinding together. I just grinned. And kept watching.
His customers stood tapping their toes and swearing under their breath when he was asked to go get something and it took a little time for him to even walk out of the room. I had to muffle my laugh. And I kept watching.
His coworkers kept pushing him to go faster, or taking over when they had run out of patience. But Luke kept plodding along.
At the end of the day, everyone else was tired and grumpy. Not Luke. He had a big smile on his face and wandered off the lot. I followed him. I grabbed his hand and asked him if he would like to come to my house. He said yes,
So we wandered down the road, chatting about this that and the other thing till we got there. Luke was alert, fun, engaging and his body might have been slow, but his mind wasn’t.
We had tea and cookies, and chatted. Then I asked Luke if he wanted to have sex with me. I said I was tired of men who rushed things. He nodded.
And I found out what patience really means as he teased me to hell and back.
Yes I knew there was a reason why I like a Slow Hand .

Pointer Sisters

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how to: break up

how to: break up

You have a choice that falls somewhere between

Kelsea Ballerini
Miss me More where you start doing all the shit you missed again

or :

Carrie Underwood
Before he Cheats and get all weird and vengeful.

Might be fun either way, but the next time you do go to love again, he might have a word with your love interest… j/s Damn exes can be like that!

crossing the floor – POV writings

Crossing the Floor – POV writings

It’s fun to put yourself in the shoes of another, but I think you have to try to be sensitive towards the fact that much as you may think you know, you are not them!
I mean i know what groin pain feels like, I gave birth to a child. Can you spell episiotomy? (memory winces are a thing!) The first bowel movement after labour is hell(ish). Much like being constipated for a week. 😦 (You might want to get on that!)

I have yet to be kicked in the balls though. Though they do say the two things are similar in pain, I have yet to hear a guy who hasn’t done serious damage say that his pain has gone on for 36-48 hours every 3 -5 minutes. Have you? (If so, please do see a doctor!)

I also have yet to have kidney stones, and they say the delivery of those blighters thru a penis is hell(ish) as well. And if they are at all similar, this might actually last the full 36-48 hours. (You have my sympathy!)

But this isn’t about pain, this is about putting something you know to be true from experiencing it, into the writing of something you can absolutely not know anything about.

Some people use it to claim they understand gender politics, when they have never lived as the other. Some use it to give advice, when they have never lived in the other person’s shoes or culture. And some use it to blame, shame and mock someone they think is being a drama queen. When they are telling you their truth.

It’s why I don’t write about things like erectile dysfunction though. I am aware and fully cognisant of performance anxiety. Yet I don’t know how that defines how you feel about yourself as a man.

Or the transgender transition issues. I know how female people are treated in the world, but I’ve always had to deal with that. I’ve never been treated otherwise and felt the change in attitude, or the outright rage that other men
might displace onto them due to their own insecurities.

It is however fun to write a fiction story and take on the character of a man in a way that I can identify with. And most people would take no issue with me doing that. They would just laugh if I got it wrong. unless it appeared to be hate inspired, rather than curiousity. Or imagination.

It’s a hard thing to do with any reality, sympathy, And I think it’s best left in the hands of someone who lives it, mostly.

But what do I know? I’m a woman! And we all know (:P) it’s a man’s world! So I guess if anyone can discuss a woman’s POV, it should be … (wait for it!) an MAN! #amiright??

my experience with “The Beauty Myth”

my experience with “The Beauty Myth”

due to a discussion I was in this past few days, I was reminded of this book.

Have you ever felt that you didn’t measure up to the social standards women are “supposed ” to be?

Have you ever felt that you weren’t included in the media portrayal of what women’s bodies and/or sexuality included?

Then you have been slapped down by the beauty myth.

I thought it was just me, till I went to univ and read this book for my sociology intro class. I thought it was either me having a self esteem crisis, or people were right and I truly wasn’t that feminine, beautiful, sexy.

You see I am fairly tall for a woman. As a teen I started getting curves where they should be and people in my culture/ faith of rearing kept telling me that to be a woman of faith, I had to be modest and cover up.

I had a brother who was 1 year older than me who could shovel food in like he was eating from a pig’s trough, but I had to step away from the table, still hungry. I was far from fat. Actually I was pretty lithe, except for having boobs. In fact, I thought I needed bigger boobs and butt. I actually won ribbons in track at school. So yeah, they should have let me graze. At 16, I was lifting more weight than any of my other sisters and probably could have out-lifted my brothers and dad. But that wasn’t good enough.

At work, at 16, I was told that i was to wear a uniform, no makeup and have my hair at the shoulders or in an up-do. Even jewelry wasn’t that welcome. You could wear your wedding band and studs in your ears.

My sisters and I were always competing over who lost weight that week, who was best at makeup, fashion, sewing, cooking, … girl craft. I was told that men were the be all and end all. Biblically ordained by God to rule everything about us womenfolk.

And it was hurtful and it was ridiculous.

Then i was shoved into the world in a big way when I left home. I went from small hamlet to big city. I had never seen a hooker before and had no clue. i mean really no clue what they were doing. No I wasn’t a virgin, but I was innocent./sheltered about prostitution.

….

That was me. I was/am a single mom. I have a daughter. And I did everything I could to avoid using superficial terms about her. When she got praise from me, it was for effort, interest, and talents. When she got discouraged, it was for bad behaviour.

I raised her in a fairly neutral home. For which I took a LOT of shit from my family. They kept giving her dolls and tea sets, which annoyed me all to hell! But they refused to stop. As long as they had access to her.

…..

The point of this is that looks and attractiveness go beyond what you put out there to the world. It also goes beyond what you feel about yourself.

As women have become more independent in their lives and sexuality, the media has responded by making beauty more sexualized, being thin as the ideal, and a standard of femininity that is rare to achieve.

According to Dr Wolf, we have met the Iron Maiden.

She affects who we are, how we are treated, how we think of ourselves, how we relate to men and how they relate to us.

If all we are are sluts whose sole purpose is to look good, then they can treat us any way they wish. They can rape us, because we are sexual beings. They can beat us, because we are their property. And they can kill us, because we have no intrinsic value.

And deny her thesis or not, if you look at the news every single day, I can prove she is right. It’s still true almost 30 years after the book came out. Can you prove she isn’t?

The Iron Maiden is killing women, whether from partners or eating disorders, gender dysmorphia or even suicides.

My daughter and I have had to live thru it. And I want it to change before I have a granddaughter to be affected by it. Is that asking too much?

….. The Beauty Myth

author Dr Naomi Wolf

pdf file of The Beauty Myth

….. summaries and reviews (POVa)

summary

sociology
psychology

culture and youth studies

feminism

Diarama (a story)

Diarama

The ladies of the club had been kicking around new ideas for something to do to raise money for renovations. I mean they weren’t the bake sale or crafts corner types…

They thought of having the subbies joust in a ren-fair or put on a play like those of the Shakespearean era, where men played women’s roles. Then one of the ladies thought of the diarama idea and that was voted in.

The subbies were to basically play a game of naked statues. They could only move if ordered and as ordered. The bidders or ticket holders got a chance to play dominant over men they couldn’t typically get near. The subbies could be made to be rude or crude to themselves or the other subbies. They could even be requested to engage in sex acts. But only as edging , teases.

Each ticket holder pulled a name of a subbie from a hat and had a chance to work with them, till someone made a believable doll of that subbie. Which considering the skill of the craftsperson, was usually about 10 minutes. They did have to make the ticket holders take turns to be fair to the craftsperson though. They could only do one at a time after all. So the diarama took most of the evening to make.

When each subbie had a doll made of them, they posed with it for a picture, then the doll was put in the diarama and the game began in ernest. Now the ticket holders could use the doll as their way to order the subbies’ movements. It became quite hilarious and had their owners laughing at the antics of their subbies, who were usually so well behaved and rehearsed in their service dynamic. Though easily led by their owners, they were aping and skittish with the ticketholders. Everyone had desolved into a fit of giggles.

They did raise a good amount of money for the reno projects. So they all were happy with the day’s work.

A few of the ladies made an extra bid for the doll of their fave subbie and got a picture of the real subbie with their doll and the winning bidder. As a memento of the day.

Poirot

Poirot

À propos Poirot:

I’m a huge fan of Agatha Christie . Of the delightful characters she has laid before us. The quixotic Miss Marple and the fuss-budget M. Poirot . Inestimable detectives with their own ways of sleuthing and finding out who dun it. I rarely figure it out before they do, which impresses me.

So it’s with love that I bring you this fanfiction, tease of M. Poirot. Based on David Suchet’sinterpretation of the character. I just streamed the TV show and several movies. Plus! I have actually read some of her books. I rarely do both. But it was a few years ago.

…. here is Poirot!

Mesdames, Messieurs, et Mesdemoiselles, toute la foule, tous mes invités,
Bonjour, bonjour! Bienvenue, bienvenue! dans ma petite chambre!
I am so happy you are here.

(Poirot kisses the air by both cheeks of the men, and softly clicks his heels and bows over the hands of the ladies, lingering over the young beautiful ones)

C’est tellement excitant. To visit the best brain, the best detective in the world, it must be such a thrill pour vous, n’est-ce pas?

Now I have prepared a little something for us. Un mélange de tisane, des chocolats et biscuits et crème.

Please to sit, asseyez-vous s’il vous plaît!

(Poirot scurries around the table to pour, but he hesitates in front of the mirror to finger comb his mustache and smiles when he is done.)

We must hurry! Vite vite! The water for the tisane must be very hot! Très chaud!

Bon!

Let us begin! N’est-ce pas?

My little grey cells are all ready to work and you will be happy you have come to Poirot.

Maintenant,

As you know peut-être, I look at the psychologie of the criminal, n’est-ce pas?

Why do these people commit such things as murder, …
Bien, pour moi, I say it is the motives of love and jealousy, le crime de la passion, and power and money, n’est-ce pas? Ces gens n’ont jamais assez! Do you not think so? That is the first crime, the first murder. Then to cover it up, the bodies, ils tombent comme les mouches! Oh le bon Dieu!
(Poirot waves his horsetail around in front of his face to shoo away the flies)

C’est importante. Poirot thinks so! And Poirot is the smartest detective on earth! In the galaxy!
Yes it is tout et juste la psychologie qui compte!
Bon! Now Poirot he has taught you all you need to know about crime. Because he Poirot is so kind to tell you this, But still, you will need Poirot to help you. So please to call Poirot if you have murder near to you. I will rush to you! Mes amis, please to call Poirot as quick, as rapidement as you can.

Il n’y a pas de temps a perdre!
Maintenant, we will talk about these bon chocolats! They are Belgian, oui? Mais bien sûr! The best in the world it must be for the best detective, n’est-ce pas? Poirot he thinks so!
And Poirot must serve his guests the best. None of this… this… eau de vaisselle! the Anglais, ils appellent café et thé soit!
(Poirot looks like he is going to be sick at the thought. Poirot takes a dainty sip of the tisane and blots the edge of his mustache with a linen napkin. Then Poirot smiles at the prettiest woman in the room)

Mais, we must discuss the criminals, non? La femme is beaucoup de triste, n’est-ce pas? Surtout si elle est jeune et jolie. ou vieux et infirme. Poirot he is always the gentleman, non?
(Poirot smiles at the ladies)

And the men? They are men of good character who have done wrong, if they are friends or of noble lignée ou richesse, non? The evil men, they come from men who are nouveau riche or working class. C’est vrais mais domage.
A moins qu’ils ne soient racistes! Je déteste ça! Je crache dessus!

Alors c’est ça! I must keep a few of the secrets to Poirot maintenant, n’est-ce pas? Until I am ready to retire, non?
And how have you all enjoyed the grignote et discute avec Poirot,
aujourd’hui?
Bon! Poirot doit partir pour une réunion avec Scotland Yard maintenant! Poirot he is important, non?
Au revoir mes cher amis! A tout à l’heure

~~ la fin ~~ Poirot out!

portent (a story)

Portent

All day I’d been getting this itchy, tense feeling. Like something or someone was watching me. I kept looking over my shoulder in jerky movements, until my neck was tense and really sore. I was feeling really tense in my chest as well. And my head was starting to ache. Paranoia? Or was I coming down with some illness?
I finally went to bed. Taking something to help me sleep, or at least relax. And it took effect soon after. Well to a degree.
I was becoming drowsy and was in that tween state of relaxation, between sleep and awake. But I kept twitching awake. Like something was startling me. An arm or a leg would jerk and I would wake and look around.
It was beginning to upset me, and almost had me ready to get up and go do something to distract myself.
But then I dozed off and actually went to sleep.
Which I now regret.
As soon as I fell asleep, I started to dream. It came almost in a series of stills or photo vignettes. Which was beyond weird for me. I barely dream, let alone like that!
I saw two owls rise above my house and sit on the roof.
Then they started squabbling at each other.
They flew up and started to fight. They seemed intent on killing each other. Right over my house.
One of the owls dropped to my porch, in front of my door.
And at last glance it had a red ribbon around it’s neck.
I woke up screaming. And could not go back to sleep. So I got up and went to watch something nice on TV. Some light comedy or something. To get my head out of this twitchy state of mind.
I was feeling really oppressed. Like the other shoe was about to drop. Like this was the eleventh hour on the clock of doom. And it was getting harder to breathe. I wasn’t the type to get panic attacks, but that seemed to be how I was feeling. Dread.

“By the pricking of my thumb, something wicked this way comes”
Shakespeare

That feeling.
So when the phone rang, it took every ounce of courage I had in me, and me chanting prayers to my goddesses for me to answer it.
I was right to be afraid…
It was the hospital calling to tell me that my friend had been in a car crash and I should come immediately. It was bad and she was not stable. She was slipping in between life and death.
I threw jeans and a coat on over my PJs and grabbed my keys and went running for my car.
I broke every speed limit going to the hospital.
And it was only by the skin of my teeth that I arrived in time to hold her hand as she slipped out of life for the last time.
I sat there shaking for the longest time. Too upset to cry.
Finally the nurse called a doctor and I was sedated. I woke up later on a bed, in my own room, with a nurse beside me.
It all came crashing back on me then. And I fell apart. My world had just changed. I was diminished.

intimate partner violence/murder

intimate partner violence/murder

#spouse #cohabitant #family #date #play date

There is one tip that will see you safe(r) among them all.

Whether you call it a play date, pickup play or whatever, most people give you the advice to be careful going into the relationship. But spousal or relationships would get the opposite advice, be most careful as you exit.

There is no real way to protect yourself, except to be aware of who is around you and how they are feeling. But how do you do that, if you’re not psychic?

You can’t.

Much as they may trust you, most people don’t let you into their inner life, their mind, their emotions. Esp if their emotions are that disturbed. They tend to get really, really good at hiding them from you.

So trust is an illusion. Because it’s more likely your partner of 30 years will kill you, than the date you want to see tonight. Or the parent or sibling you have known all your life.

But some do tell you their inner life. And when they do, most experts would ignore them if they went for help. If they’re expressing the emotion, or the fantasy, experts will usually say they’re amenable to therapy and therefore not as great a risk to you or others. They will also say that expressing the fantasy is often cathartic, not an actual threat.

But how much sense does that make, when you realize that extremely few to no murders are truly impulsive? They thought about it before they did it, they wrote about it, sang about it, role played violence…. They expressed an interest in violence resulting in death. Somehow, some way.

Unless they at that second picked up whatever was handy and went thwack.

And even then they were used to feeling the motivational aims of violence and murder. The rage, the jealousy, the lust for blood….the association of emotion and violence, and emotional resolution by violence, rape and/or death. Which came first, the chicken or the egg? If experts don’t know or agree…

Having been in a DV relationship, I’m going to flout the experts on this catharsis view. If someone tells you they want to kill you, believe them and run. Run far, run fast!! Because people do. die. every. single. year from partners who are supposed to love and care for them. As for me, I ran. It’s the only reason I’m alive today.

They also are killed every single year by family members. And how do you avoid or escape that? Family is often something you are born into and die in. Violence, addictions and incest are often inter-generational dynamic defects. What you learn is often what you yourself live. To some degree. Which makes you query a Biblical/divine curse.

New International Version: Exodus: 34:7

maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation.”

or the role of genetics.

It’s not 100%, but it is a very common issue. One you should know about your partner before you engage in the relationship. What work have they done to overcome their rage/shame/pain about their upbringing? What healthy models have they participated in?

Are they sober? When was the last time they had a drink or some drug that affects their perception and/or mood regulation?

At the risk of blaming the victim, where do you mention caution and responsibility, esp knowing that how you process emotions and addictions is often predetermined by your genes? Mostly completed before you are 7 years of age. Whether bonding or social learning is the issue.

And that this pre-set condition leads you into a lifetime of meeting the same type of souls. Who if you have been victimized, will victimize you again? Offenders aren’t the only ones who have recurrent behaviours to consider. So is everyone who has been reared in these dynamic struggles.

Victims are often revictimized . And how do you deal with that? By seeing a therapist when you feel most like isolating and protecting yourself? By educating yourself when you can hardly think straight and your stress level is thru the roof? By confiding in someone when your inclination is to trust no one? That is asking a LOT. But that would more likely protect you from further abuse.

Stranger danger is a farce and trust is an illusion then.

So how do you protect yourself? Investigate someone? People are pretty tech savvy these days. They know that if you put it out there, it can be found. Plus, the sure thing is most people think that that person may be violent, but they won’t do it with me. For some idiotic reason, they cannot grasp that yes it can and will occur. IF they are that person’s type, IF they have the needed dynamic.

But can you go thru life isolating yourself? When your natural inclinations are to bond and to obey your instincts and primal needs? No, most people cannot.

So you have to engage in some form of risk mitigation. Right? Just presume that the person is a feral animal. If it is in a cage, don’t put your hand between it and it’s food or water. Or you will get bitten. If the animal wants to kill, and thinks it can get away with it, it will kill. You can only trust this beast as much as it has a sturdy chain and very strong harnass. It has to believe it will get caught! That you are not taking away it’s food or water.

The most effective chain is the thought of social censure/social death.

Bottomline, most experts will say that anyone would and could kill if they had the right motive, if they thought they could get away with it.

So you need to choose… what activity or relationship is worth your life? Because that is truly the choice you are making.

If you give someone ultimate power over you, they will abuse it. If you give them limits, they will test them to be sure they stand. That you mean what you say. That you keep secrets.

So unless you plan on only seeing this partner in public places, then maybe the best safety measure for kinksters and vanillas is to have a buddy. Someone that knows you are seeing this person, when and where and under what terms. And make sure your date/partner knows you’re not a very secretive person. Then they understand that they are more likely to get caught.

Because the advantage for DV cases is that the cops know where to look first. The spouse, the family. That is a hard and fast rule. So make sure you have someone who knows your habits and has a copy of your updated contacts. Or at least where to access them.

So if something happens to you, they can tell the cops where you were and who with.

Maybe that is the best weapon. I think AA/NA has it right about secrets being dangerous. In this case, we keep finding out that someone died because nobody knew what they were up to or going thru. Is this secret way to get your nut off worth your life? Most rational people would say no. So tell someone. One person. It may save your life.

And then you can play vanilla or edge play, knowing that at least if you die from a bad relationship choice, someone will know who to blame. I mean it works for hookers, right?

So that one tip that makes you safe(r) that I mentioned at the top of this piece?

Secrets kill.

….. the theory

According to Forensic psychiatrist Dr. Park Dietz:

There are four common motives behind intimate-partner killings, applicable whether they are gay or straight, married or common-law, or partners who cohabitate

The first—and most common—motive Dietz sees is anger, expressed in a pattern of escalating rage, abuse and violence.
The next-most-common motive: fear of abandonment and loss.

A third commonly seen motive, he says, is sexual jealousy. This includes everything from becoming upset that she flirted with someone to knowledge of an actual affair.

A fourth reason a male partner kills his wife is that he’s suicidal. The killer may or may not then take his own life. Some of them chicken out at that point

A&E interview

….

According to Professor David Wilson:

Self-righteous killers hold the mother responsible for the breakdown of the family and will often call her before to explain what he is about to do. > Disappointed killers believe their family has let them down, and the killing could be sparked by something like children not choosing to follow religious customs.

Anomic killers see the family as a symbol of their own economic success, but if they suffer some kind of economic failure — bankruptcy, for example — the family no longer serves this function.

Paranoid killers are often motivated by a desire to protect their family from a perceived threat, such as having children taken away by social services.

WIRED interview

….

Honour killing by family and/or community members who are attempting to control either fertility or sexuality of women. There is a debate as to which.

Dept of Justice Canada

….

Researchers have found that one fourth to one half of men who commit acts of domestic violence also have substance abuse problems (Gondolf, 1995; Leonard and Jacob, 1987; Kantor and Straus, 1987; Coleman and Straus, 1983; Hamilton and Collins, 1981; Pernanen, 1976) and that a sizable percentage of convicted batterers were raised by parents who abused drugs or alcohol (Bureau of Justice Statistics, 1994). Studies also show that women who abuse alcohol and other drugs are more likely to be victims of domestic violence (Miller et al., 1989).

TIP paper

Unrequited Love (a story)

Unrequited Love

Maxine Nightingale
Lead Me On

Patrick was so much of everything Genie had ever wanted in a man. Smart, sexy, funny, successful, kind… There was only one problem. Patrick only saw her as a friend.

I have often heard you say
You love me as a friend
But I love you more than anyone
You know I can’t pretend no longer

Genie had tried everything that had ever worked for her before to get Patrick to fall for her. She was his football mate, his pool shark, his card partner…. she was his chef and tailor…. his sounding board, his cheer leader…. and she put on her absolute best glad rags to knock his socks off. She saw that he enjoyed her company and saw the glimmer of lust in his eyes. And there was that one night they kissed under the mistletoe. And Patrick almost went for more, but he caught himself. She knew he was into her, just not enough to do what she wanted. He said he didn’t want to lead her on… Genie said it was ok for them to be FWBs. She could handle it.

Come on and lead me on
Tease me all night long
I’d rather be a fool with a broken heart
Than someone who never had a part of you

Genie wished that Patrick would be a little less honourable, but then he wouldn’t be the gentleman she respected, would he? But the last thing she wanted to be to Patrick was friend-zoned. She wanted a chance to show him how good they could be in bed, Because she lusted after him. And she had shown him every aspect of her she thought he might fall for. She made it so he enjoyed her company. A lot!.

You know I told you from the start
Exactly how I feel
Time goes on, seems nothing’s changed
I’m in love for real
We have never played the games
That real lovers do
So maybe we are better off
But, baby, I’d still like this from you

So Genie started bringing the intimacy a bit closer, and a bit closer. To show Patrick how good they were together. Or at least could be. She started being more flirtatious, asked him to dance and found ways to make it dirty, and let their natural friendly affection hang on a bit longer. And she saw that Patrick was noticing. And starting to respond. But still he was a gentleman. Blast him!

So finally she stopped acting and sat with him one night at her place. She told him how much she respected the fact he seemed to want to protect her from herself, but she was a grown woman and didn’t need him to make decisions for her.

And moved closer and closer to him.

Come on and lead me on
Come on and tease me all night long
Lovin’ you I know it’s right
I’ll always need you, I’ll never leave you

Come on and lead me on
Tease me all night long
I’d rather be a fool with a broken heart
Than someone who never had a part of you

But Patrick said no. Gently but firmly. It was the nicest let down she had ever had. He kissed her and left her apt. Genie was pretty sure he heard her start to cry, but he kept walking out.

Genie had tried everything. Now she’d be alone.

on Aurora Teagarden

on Aurora Teagarden

I’m searching for the foils of: Aurora Teagarden,
while she is searching for who dun it.

….

author of the books Charlaine Harris

Hallmark movies series

…. the foils

The “real murders” club is a small town group that discuss crime as fans. They are avid readers of fiction and true crime stories. If I were there, I would adore!! that group. They discuss the theoretical crime. And when a real crime hits town, act as a sounding board and research assts for Aurora.

….

Ex beau Arthur, and his new wife Lynn, are cops.

And Aurora’s beau for a few movies, Martin (ex CIA agent)
are very law and order types. They have the conflicts of occupational pride and fear for Aurora’s safety. And a genuine interest in crimes. It is their career after all.

The men help her solve and “protect” her as they can, which Lynn isn’t thrilled by at all.

In a soft way, the cops are Aurora’s rivals. It is a matter of which gets the case solved, forensic evidence collection (the cops), or motives (Aurora’s crew). If it takes social research or understanding of people, Aurora finds the culprit. And considering the cops are also hampered by laws and protocol that bind their hands and predetermine their tactics, and Aurora isn’t as much, she can get in where they can’t. She can go as a nosy, “friendly” neighbour. Under the premise that people slip because they actually want to tell someone. That at least some are narcissistic enough to think they can get away with it.

And the cops know the crimes that have been found out. Aurora’s crew know the stories that have made it into fiction or true crime novels. That have captured the public imagination. It’s more like they have a well each of them draws from. And it is a contest to see which well covers this particular crime. Aurora is more inclined to share with the cops, than they are with her. Mostly because it would be unsafe for her to drag in the criminal.

….

Aurora’s bestie Sally, is a journalist.

They share the love of the story and adventure. Sally usually helps and supports Aurora. But every now and then she gets a cold shiver and rats Aurora out to the police or her mom. She is worried about her friend’s safety after all.

…..

Aurora’s mother Aida, is a real estate agent.

She is very intelligent, creative and scared for her daughter.

Aida broke up with one of Aurora’s closest allies in the club because he kept helping Aurora and she thought it put her daughter in danger to do so.

….

But the best foil IMO is her fellow librarian Lillian, and the way they see the world, books and people – one very OCD, everything counted and put in place, systemic (Lillian). And one loving the mess, the story, the people, the passion (Aurora). Lillian is a friend of Aurora’s mother and greatly respects and admires her. Not so much Aurora though. Funny/sad thing is, Lillian is a minor character.

…. the conflict

(besides the murders)

I see feminism and how people impact a woman’s life and personality, how much they intrude in their ideas of who she should be, and what their motives could be as a major theme. I’m not sure if that is intended, or me imposing my views on a simple story?

Aurora is a southern USA young woman who is bucking tradition. While her mother is an independent, smart, savvy, sassy woman of the world, she wants her daughter to be a southern belle it seems. Her daughter must be sedate, domesticated, married with kids, settled. And Aurora does try, she really does (Bless her heart!), but she just will not accept that mold. Much as she loves her mother, she just cannot do that and be who she is.

And the men she is attracted to? They fall for everything she values about herself. But at some point, she has to become the southern belle and their wife, the mother of their kids. And “forget this foolishness”.

But that is not what Aurora wants or needs. She wants a “partner in crime”. Not a traditional husband at all. They tend to have conflict and eventually break up. One to marry another woman, the other to acccept a new post he hadn’t really been looking for. He asked Aurora to go with him, but she has the life she wants. So why should she?

Maybe new neighbour Nick will be that for her?

….. Caveat –

I’ve never read the books. It’s very rare that I both read a book and watch a tv show or movie based on it. I like my way of thinking about things and the few times I’ve tried, it has really wrecked things for me. So it’s either one or the other.

But I do love what seems like a really simple, cute (I mean HALLMARK, right?) movie that could be really profound and timely for women.

I’ve also only seen the movies that center around her relationship with Martin so far.

Have you seen them? Or read the books? What do you think?