retro-active consent withdrawal articles/info
…. definition
a) begins as consensual sexual contact but sex is withdrawn during the act and person continues forcibly to engage
b) victim needs time and awareness to fully understand what occurred and realizes they were violated
….potential reasons
– they were a virgin and didn’t have anything to compare it to
– they were confused about what had occurred
– it began as consentual contact, but the rapist continued after no was said, past what activity they had agreed to
– they felt unsafe
– they feel they were coerced, manipulated, or bullied into sexual relations
– they feel they were lied to –
fed false promises of protection, a relationship, pay in the case of prostitution, – were led to believe their partner was free (unmarried, unattached) and open for sexual contact,
– were led to believe the person was SAFE to have sex with (ie no STDs or other sexual/health issues that impact their sexual behaviour and your intimacy)
– they were in a state of neurogenic shock or tonic immobility
– they were sedated by rape drugs, high on drugs, and/or alcohol and needed time to sober up
– they thought they deserved to be mistreated –
due to self esteem issues,
– due to prior cases of DV/rape,
– guilt for something they had done in the relationship (ie cheating)
– they had a trauma syndrome – rape, PTSD, anxiety
– they were suicidal, agoraphobic
– the rapist was part of a familial, employment, school, temple and/or social group and they needed time to individuate
– they were lovers/spouses and they needed time to separate due to kids, finances, cohabitation
– their lover/spouse was a good provider, usually good to them but the violence and lack of concern for their autonomy/safety/life was escalating
– as well as threat to others
– they needed therapy to understand the full impact
– they needed to gather evidence, support, to be assessed
– they knew this person had a bad history (ie family history, addictions) and thought they needed help/support but lost patience with their efforts
– they didn’t think they’d be believed. (a vulnerable target – child, teen, prostitute, mentally ill person, criminal, homeless person- against a seemingly unassailable perpetrator)
mspeachierocks 