held captive by love (a story)

Held Captive by Love

Bridget fell in love with a charming man. He was smooth, sexy and thrilling whenever she was around. Their love grew, and grew. Ron took her to dinner and held her chair. Whenever they walked together, he held her elbow and made sure she was out of the path of cars, strangers and anything thrown out the windows above the sidewalks they walked on.
She thought he was a gentleman.
When Ron was pretty sure he had her, well and truly in his power, he started the bickering. The blaming and shaming. Nothing she did was good enough for him. He wittled on her self esteem till she walked around with her head down and whispered, instead of speaking up for herself. She was too fat, she dressed like a school marm, she sounded like an idiot and school had obv been wasted on her. Bridget was a good enough cook to have actually worked in a pro kitchen, but none of her suppers ever pleased him.
Then came the isolation phase. Bridget was not allowed to have a job, or go to school. Her friends weren’t good enough to come to his home. Her family had too many problems to be believed and he didn’t want them influencing her, so they had to stay away.
The man took care of the family. It didn’t matter if they were on welfare, so long as the cheque was in his name. They could go to the food bank and he must be the one who received the money. If he stole, she couldn’t even control coin for the laundry machine. If he was in jail, his friends took over his demeaning of her.
When Ron thought she was beaten down enough, he started slapping her around. Then it was a beating that got more and more cruel. Then he didn’t care if she wanted sex or not, he took it anyway.
Why did she stay?
At first she called him on the way he treated her… Ron would sit on their bed and listen. He’d tell her about how his dad beat his mom. She knew it was true. She’d met the family by then. His sister was beaten by her husband as well.
Ron would cry and beg Bridget to forgive him. So she gave him another chance. She thought she could teach him what love was. She thought she could help him. She could see the poor little boy in his eyes…and it broke her heart, over and over again.
Then there was the time she thought she was pregnant. But it turned out to be a cyst and she had to get emergency treatment. Ron was so good to her. For years afterwards she’d remember how good he had been and wish she could find that man again.
Bottomline, Bridget was confused and so hurt that she had fallen into a state of inertia. Nothing he did made her able to act for her own safety. The beatings got worse and worse. Bridget was beginning to fear for her life. But they didn’t happen every day. And Ron always seemed so sorry afterwards that she forgave him. Till she ended up in the hospital.
Again Ron treated her so well and promised he’d go get therapy. Whatever he needed to do to get her to stay.
So what were her reasons? Well no person hits their lover or spouse the first day they meet. It’s like being seduced in a way. Or like a dance. Little bits of this and that are lost or given away in the steps. And replaced with torment and neglect. Till you are immersed in this state of being that you can’t imagine a way out of.
And Bridget had no money, her family and friends were gone. She had no skills to hold down basic life needs. And she was defeated. She thought this was all she deserved. Ron had convinced her of that. He had put more energy into abusing her than he had into anything else he had ever done in his life.
And the few times she was away, he had such a hold over her, she was scared to not follow his orders. Because whenever she even thought about getting away, he’d show up again. Like he knew, like he was psychic.
Ron had become her monster. Her demon and she couldn’t see any way to get free. Unless she was dead.
She just wasn’t sure if it would be by his hand or her own yet. She just knew it would be soon.

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