the making of a social marionette (a story)

instead of a person.

> I used to think the worst thing in life is to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone. – Robin Williams

**the alienation string**
When she was born, she was hugged for a whole minute by a nurse, till her father told the nurse it was just spoiling the child. She was educated by the law, but all her teachers were told she was too stupid to ever be able to use it. So they were just wasting their time.

**the expectations string**
Her mother wanted to teach her how to be a girl, but her father said all girls did was practice to be a wife and a mother or a whore. What was the point in that? Her father wanted a son, and if her parts didn’t match to that wish, he’d do all but cut them off, so he could have his will over her.

**the failure to protect string**
At school she was bullied and tortured by those who thought she should be like them. When she walked the streets, she was catcalled and pursued by men who thought she was made for their pleasure. Her father told her she was emitting whore radar. And she ought to be more chaste.

**the failure to nurture string**
If anyone ever asked her her dreams, she was laughed at for even daring. How could she be anything but a wife and mother or a whore? She was given a tea set, a doll and a make up kit. To see which she’d become.

**the sibling favouritism string**
Her sister who knitted, crocheted and baked was praised. Her sister who played the violin was praised. Her brother who built things, and repaired cars was praised. Her brother who won a math championship was praised. She was told she was a lazy misfit. Who would never amount to anything. No matter what she was good at.

**the “I told you so”, “you deserved it” double string**
When her first boyfriend dumped her without a ring or a baby, she was told now she’d be the whore they always knew she was.
When she was good at nothing her siblings were, they said she was obviously just as lazy and stupid as they always thought she was.
When she was raped and abused, they told her her whore radar had worked too well and she should have been more chaste.

**the manipulation string**
Family and friends used dark words and wishes to tell her how to be. They begged, they threatened… till she gave in just so they’d stfu!! already.

**the evil world string**
When she succeeded in the larger world, they reminded her the Bible and the church said the world was evil. When she failed, she was told she was measuring herself to the wrong standards, and had wasted her time and energy on the wrong people and things.

**the failure to individuate string**
Everywhere she went, she heard their voices in her head. Saying she had to be what they thought she should or she was a whore or a failure. No matter how many miles away they were, they still controlled her and she actually lived as their voices told her she should. She actually missed them. And found people who mistreated her as badly as them.

In the end, she was nothing but [plastic.][] cuzz she never left the doll house.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s