Odd Letters

“Love” from a friend(?)

Dear buddy,

We’ve known each other all our lives and been in school together most of those years. Our parents have lived next door for a good chunk of that and been friends as well. So you know what I’m putting on the line here. We’ve seen each other at worst and best, naked and on our wedding days. So I thought if there was anyone I could ask, it would be you…

Buddy, I wanna fuck your wife. Just once, unless she likes it. You can watch if you want. Why you might ask would I dare ask this of you? My wife is a frigid piece, and I need to get laid.  And I thought I could trust my BFF to keep my secret. Let me know ASAP, pls!

Desperate friend,


A Love Letter that Gets You High

Dear Sammy,

miss you so much my love! It’s been so many days since I held you. Too much time has passed and I just need you so much. Looking forward to our next visit, But till then, let my love keep you warm. Wish I was allowed to visit you at prison more often.


A “love letter” that scares you
Dear neighbour,
I’ve moved into my current apt, just to be closer to you. I used to have to take two buses to check in on you everyday and they closed one of the routes. They said there wasn’t sufficient need. The supervisor I killed wouldn’t change his mind.Luckily there was an open let nearer to you.Now I know where you shop, where you work and even where you and your friends like to hang out. I can crawl onto your balconey and watch you sleep too.I knew you were perfect for me the first time I saw you. I can’t wait till you and I can be together forever. One more death and we will be together forever.Then I can be your girl friend. : )
“Love Letter” from a Thief

Dear home owner.

I came here for some money and things I could take to the pawn shop to sell for drugs. Thanks for that. I found your piggy banks and the household “emergency funds” jar. I found some really cool paste jewelry that might be worth a dollar or two.  There were the electronics and some higher end suits and your watch. I’m glad you left the watch home.

But the fun part for me was finding your adult toy bag. I think my GF and I are going to try out a few of those before I sell them. So thx in advance for our fun weekend coming! Your videos of your friends and you playing will be fun to watch for ideas. And they should hit some stars in my FB group on amateur porn. You might become famous! I’ll let you know.  Thx again!

Your cordial thief!

Dear MsP,

I saw your page on that kink site you’re a member on. The pix of you getting your kink on were so hot! I think we’d get along so well. If I was your sub though, instead of your thing, I’d want you to try some flogging and wax play, maybe some knife and breath play.  I think you’d like them as well. Esp of I did them to you, not getting you to do them to me. Can we get together this weekend and play?

Dear Teacher,

Here is some reading on femdom you should review.  (attached file)

cc school principle and board chair

“love letter” from a fan

 Dear serial killer,

I’ve been watching your case for a while.  Even before you were a thing in the eyes of the law and the news, I saw you coming. I know what you were doing. Because it’s my fantasy too!
I want to see them sweat and cry.  I want them begging for their freedom and their life.  I want them to be helpless and horrified, not only by my actions, but also their body’s betrayal.  It’s the best laugh ever.
They think I’m impotent cuzz I don’t have sex with that mess of humanity. That’s the best part, laughing over their idiocy. They think they’re so smart!
I know you enjoy all of what I do.  So I wanted you to hear from someone who gets you.  Just before they kill you, you will know, I’m out here carrying the mission on.
Your fellow killer

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