Oh Romeo Romeo wherefore art thou sweet Romeo

(a story) Oh Romeo Romeo, wherefore art thou sweet Romeo

She was looking for a love like she read about. Written by the bards! The old poets!
A man who cherished her and protected her. A man who loved her more than she loved herself. Who provided for her. So she could be his damselle, his princess.
What did she find? The men around her were guys she had watched grow up and had listened to all their fart jokes and watched their butts when they mooned out of the bus window. Yep, no prince or hero amongst them!
Then there were her dad’s pervy friends who watched her bug-eyed as she walked thru the house and called for beer or sammies whenever she managed to relax for a few minutes. They pinched her butt or dragged her across their laps and joked with her dad about what a great wife she would be. Blegh…she shivered in disgust! Not theirs!
She watched her older sisters walk away from their small town with a bad boy and come back a few years later, either an addict or pregnant. So yeah, that aint happening either!
Her brothers! They were growing up to be a chip off their dad’s shoulder. And frankly, she pitied!!! the girls who got these misogynistic cretons! EWWWWWW!! All she could say about them was they could handle their tools well. (No she DIDN”T mean the ones between their legs!)
But wherever she looked, there was no Romeo to be found. And seriously, she wasn’t too sure she wanted to die at 16 for a grand romance, anyway.
GET THEE TO A NUNNERY, JULIETTE!!
That would work a lot better if she were Catholic! Did girls really do that, pining for love?
She’d much rather be single than have any of these options in men around for the rest of her life.
So she waited…till she could wander into the bigger world and see if it was just her area that was barren of princes and heroes.
She found artists, musicians, chefs, factory workers, waiters, bartenders, male nurses,… but no princes or heroes. Le Sigh!! A bunch of guys who wanted fun and not romance or commitment. GROAN!
Or they wanted to be friends, just friends! She was starting to pick up some really really cute friends. BUGGER!!
(I know you’re getting as bored as she was!)
Only in a gothic romance does this lead up to a werebeast, vampire, demon or angel showing up.
She spent her life in a lonely search for her prince or hero who never showed up. Taking care of herself as HE should have. Saying no every time the guys she knew growing up offered her marriage and family. All she saw in them was the mooning boy who told fart jokes. She somehow missed that they had hair on their chests now. If she saw a beer in their hands, she thought they had leaped into their father and wouldn’t even hang around long enough to see if they liked her. There would be no drunken leches in her life or her daughter’s!!
So the day came when she took her last gasp, having lived a life spent wishing for a prince or hero who never came to save her….

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