Mental Aspects of BDSM

Sent: Thursday, April 30, 2015 at 6:32 PM
Subject: Mental Aspects of BDSM

The Deeper Bonds in Bondage to a Domme

I am Your Parent – the one who nurtures you, loves you and provides what you need to be a whole person. I guide you in the shaping of who you are and who I envision you becoming. This vision is always changing.

I am your care giver – the one who gathers all your services, resources, toys and games and sees you have fun and learning opportunities within them. I see you keep a positive attitude about life, love and yourself.

I am your guardian – the one who sees you are safe. You have your needs met, understand your limits and goals, and have a sense of morality in the way you live your life. I see that you have good people around you in mentors and peers.

I am your teacher/ mentor – the one who guides your journey, setting up learning opportunities so you can practice your skills and learn to best rule yourself. To practice and compete against yourself first.

I am your priestess – the one who shows you the world you live in and the gods and demons who divine it. I tell you the stories and show you the rites of this world so you can become a true supplicant.

I am your friend/ confessor – I give you a safe place to go when the world is beyond annoying, negative and intrusive. i see you have emotional control over yourself first and foremost. I help you find who you are vs who the world wants you to be.

I am your mate – the one who cherishes your body and tempts it into what I want from you. Who teaches you how to please me best. So I can please you as well. We learn about each other’s fantasies and fulfill them.

The Bonds

are made of emotions and spiritual needs. Ties and cuffs are the least reliable bonds you have. I intend to teach you how to escape any physical restraint put on you. To serve only those who deserve your respect. But ultimately to serve yourself first. Because no momentary pleasure is worth your life or your identity.

The Discipline

ultimately comes from you. I am more your tool than you are mine. That is our goal for our relationship. To set you free as a peer of mine.
Our emotional weapons are trust, duty, emotional control, and mental sharpness and/or intuition. We work through your bonds of love/hate, duty/rebellion to arrive at a better you. We deal with frustration, shame, fear, and sadness that shape your defenses to arrive at calm thought. We use service and sensory work to achieve our results.

Pleasure and Pain (Hedonism and Sadomasochism)

These are tools used to open your senses up to your body and it’s attachments. If you remain in this loop you do not serve yourself. Or your mate.

THESE ARE OUR GOALS FOR OUR RELATIONSHIP
not just a romp in a dungeon now and then.

And what do I do to achieve all of our goals? I keep learning.

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