Sent: Thursday, November 26, 2015 at 7:25 AM
Subject: Dear Ladies and Gentlemen, did you know…
they suck you in with their charm, then when you’re well and truly hooked, thinking they are THE ONE, they start doing things that hurt you, confuse you, worry you, scare you.
Oh it’s a bad day you say, they’re not like that. I know the real them.
Oh poor them you say, they had such a bad childhood, their last partner was such a bitch/bastard to them, it broke their heart.
Well that may be true and all, but I want to know why that excuses them from hurting you? HMMM??
You think this piece is about them, don’t you?
In my couple years in fetlife (and a few vanilla sites too, don’t think I am laying it all on kinky folk. No, I’m just writing it here), I have noticed a LOT of posts about the brokenhearted who stayed too long. Who saw a pattern any professional would tell you is unhealthy building and stayed.
The person deluded themselves thinking they could "fix" this person,
So they finally get the ummph to leave and this person comes back into their life and does the "I’m sorry I messed up" seduction and things go back to the beginning. And there’s another honeymoon. Till they hook you.
And it starts again. Only this time you get blamed for going back; by friends, family and even them. (Say what?? Yes them!!)
I’m not blaming you, I am saying people tell you who they are and you should listen.
Yes every relationship has it’s issues. Every one has good and bad stuff.
The relationship is supposed to be you and them on the same team. Loving, caring for each other. Growing together as a couple and growing as individuals. If it’s not, cut bait. And DO NOT go back.
If it’s D/s M/s or vanilla, there has to be a solid foundation for people to call it love. What I see described more often is co-dependency.
It’s ok for you to be you. You are adorable and worth being loved.
It’s ok for you to be kinky. You are SOOOOOO HOOOOT!!!
NOBODY has the right to say otherwise or make you feel anything but that.